Overheard at the Co-Op

For all of you non-New Yorkers, there is this stupid place called the Park Slope Food Co-Op in Brooklyn. It’s been around for decades, and members are required to put in a few hours per month working there in order to be able to buy groceries. There are about 15 full time employees who manage the members and do other stuff. Everyone there is really smug and if you don’t bring your own reusable shopping bag, they basically set you on fire and shun you. This is not a place where it’s OK to be organic - everything must be organic AND fair trade AND Non-genetically modified AND local AND grown by a women-only commune. They have all of these smug little signs up to make you feel guilty, like pointing out which one of the three different types of sponges they sell are fully biodegradable. I went there one time with my sister, who is a member and she had to promise not to buy anything for me on my behalf. I had to sign in and was forced to wear a huge neon orange sticker on my chest that proclaimed me to be a NON-SHOPPING GUEST. Sound familiar park slopezis?

Anyway, my sister (who was incidentally once banned from shopping at the co-op for two full years for not completing her work hours) just told me about an overheard exchange between one of the full time employees and some lady shopping there:

Lady: So how’d you get to be such an expert on the cheeses?
Employee: Well, when the old cheese guy left, I was the only person on staff who wasn’t a vegan.

augh! couldn’t you just punch somebody right about now??

posted by Caroline